Don't Make Me, Please Don't

Today I felt the need to bitch slap 6 people throughout the day. If Shit jumps off tomorrow, I may have to pull a Dave Chappelle move on a mutha!

Stop Fighting Your Sister

One thing that Suite Suzy & I find our selves saying recently to Olivia is stop fighting your sister.  This is a statement that is made no less than 10 times a week.  I mean they fight like cats & dogs & it is amazing that Amelia holds her own at 3 against a 9 year old.

Really the fights are laughable but still annoying & I have been asking Olivia to be an example instead of an adversary.

Me asking Olivia to stop fighting with her sister is like the pot calling the kettle black because my sister “Baby” & I are always going head up & we have the same age gap as my kids.

Baby & I have not always fought because when we were kids, I would just beat her & my little brother up to get my way.  I guess when I was a late teen & even when I left my mom’s nest, they both figured that they could get with me & beat my ass if needed.

My brother & I hardly argue, probably because he can’t hold a conversation topic for no longer than 3 minutes, however when I piss him off, I really piss him off!

Now Baby & I at times fight like cats & dogs, usually because I start in by telling her what she “needs to do”.  The arguments get ugly but after a few days of back & forth we calm it down to regroup.

More recently, she tells me that she knows where I am coming from, but her life is her life & she is doing the best that she can.

Sometimes I just get upset because I see so much more potential wasting away with some of the things that I perceive that she is doing/not doing.

Today I caught myself starting an argument with her about what she needs to do in terms of providing a stable environment for my nephews.   Before I could get going, she cut me off & said that she was not in the mood to be preached at by the “perfect one”.

After we got off the phone, I actually felt bad about my approach.  I kind of felt helpless as I watch my sister live life of the fringes of ghetto society.

I guess I really need to chill & not stress her out because she is 6 months pregnant & I do not want to cause any additional headache for her.

When it all boils down to it, Baby gets on my damn nerves like no other but I love her so & only want the best for her & her piccaninnies

Flashing forward & backward at the same time, last Friday Baby & I spent the day together, which is rare.  2 weeks ago, she asked me to go to her next prenatal appointment so that I could hear the baby’s heart beat. For some reason, I felt honored that she asked.

So we went to the appointment & it was pretty status quo.  After the appointment, we headed downtown Detroit for a delicious lunch at Eph McNally’s (and of course, I had to pay!!!).

After a lunch, we spent the remainder of our time together walking around browsing at the African World Festival, which was nice.  Our time together was quality & it felt like we were really having a special brother/sister bond thing going on.

Switching subjects but yet staying on the same topic, I found out today that my momma & aunt “Juicy P” got into a major argument yesterday as they drove to see my uncle.  There was no blood shed but from what I heard, if one of them had a blade, it would have been on.  By the way, the fight had nothing to do with Juicy P calling me an “Ugly Jesus”.

Damn, just what is it about baby sisters that drive older sibling nuts?

BTW, if you read mylast "A Few Questions" post, you will see that my sister decided to get a cornrow mowhawk. I thought it was sharp!

A Few Questions

I have a lot of ideas in my head that I need to write out but I seem to have writitus now & I found questions easier to spill out.  Indulge me if you will... 

• Why come “Lucy Pearl” broke up? I loved them so & need another release.
  
• What come Congress is apologizing for slavery & Jim Crow now & what does it really mean for those of us who are “Black in America”? And does the timing have anything to do with Barack Obama? And what about my damn reparation bitch?
  
• Why come my 30” High Definition Mac monitor is off the mutha fucking hook?
  
• Why come one in every two Negroes choose to have unsafe sex, which led to them getting HIV/AIDS? And can we make them get a tattoo on there forehead that says “you don’t want none of this” since they seem to not tell anyone? And finally why is this such big news now? And finally one mo gin', why can't people just masturbate instead of spreading the hot mess to others?
  
• Why did I get all sad when I learned that Estelle Getty died last week?
  
• Why come guys in the DC area wearing pixie pants aka bitch jeans aka skinny jeans?
  
• Why come I’m so fucking excited to be going to Toronto for a long lovers getaway this weekend?
  
• Why come John McCain is blaming high gas prices on Barack Obama?
  
• Why come Congresstrick Congresswoman Carolyn Cheeks-Kilpatrick give up her braids for those hideous wigs? IS it becuase she is trying to soften her image inthe midst of her stupid assed son's various Detroit scandals?
  
• Why come no one called me this morning and offered me the photographic opportunity of a lifetime.
  
• Why come the stall at work out of tissue yesterday & I did not realize until I was finished taking a major dump after some Taco Bell?
  
• Why come XM Radio took my station XM80 “the Move” off the air?  I’m pissed!!!
  
• Why come I get chills when I listen to Nina Simone’s “I Love You Porgy”?  
  
• Why come my kids insist that the know what ghetto means?
  

What Does it Really Mean

So on my last post, I mentioned that Suite Suzy & I discussed what is meant by the term “Black Experience”.

Basically, my position was I do not know what it means & no sure if I grew up in the “Black Experience”. Suite Suzy who essentially grew up in a white household thinks the “Black Experience” can be broken down into different socioeconomic classes of Black folk & that the term can apply across the board. Suite Suzy also says that there really is no “Black Experience” & thinks the construct is stupid.

For the hell of it, I asked if we are living the Black Experience now & she says no. What makes us different than the Australians next door other than skin complexion & sex appeal? I tend to agree with my boo (rare) on this one, but want to hear from you out there.

My experience:
I grew up in a household 1 of 3 children (different dads), single mother (most times), on welfare until I was around 10, in a relatively poor neighborhood(s) in Birmingham & Detroit. So my question is, did I live the “Black Experience” & is my experience so different than other races or others within my race.

Now, I live in middle class environment, have a stable family & job, love fried perch sandwiches with hot sauce, shop at Whole Foods & on the winning side of the digital divide. Does this mean that my kids are missing the Black Experience???

• Is there such a thing as a “Black Experience”?
  
• Is this a self-imposed or white term (like African American (you already know how I feel about that))?
  
• Have you or have you live[d] the “Black Experience”?
  
• Does the common thread of racial identity make us one?
  
• Is there a socioeconomic division that separates some Blacks from the rest?
• Did Obama not really live the "Black Experience"??? (bonus questions...)

Since it is Black History month, I expect some damn answers from yo' ass, so talk to me!

And since we are on the subject, but not really, here is a shot of me living the "Black Experience" with my iPhone & Mudcloth printed scarf by Aziz.

About Last Night VIII: My Bubble Yum is Poppin'

Suite Suzy & I saw the Alvin Ailey Dance Company tonight on an adult only date. Originally the whole family was going but then Olivia ran her mouth & acted up yesterday so she was reprimanded & because she got so off the hook during the jump off, she was told that she would not be going. Then today Sade got sick & was not up to going although she really wanted to.

Sade being sick really put us in a pickle because we shipped Olivia off to Suite Suzy's mom already & had no one to watch Sade so that we could still attend. Well after some frantic calls around we got one of Suite Suzy's best friends (Ramona Jones (street name given to those looking to boo up)) to baby sit.

Ramona Jones showed up around 6pm, then Suite Suzy & I hit the door with the quickness. 35 minutes later, we were at the Detroit Opera House box office purchasing 2 box seat tickets (saved 50 bucks, since it was just before the show). With tickets in hand, we had an hour to kill, so we shot over to the Centaur for a cocktail & light snack. 55 minutes later, we were back at the Opera House perched on our seats.

We got the bomb box seat, as we faced the stage dead on. Talk about great luck!!!

OK, so just before the house lights went down, the woman across from me started to pop her gum all up in my ear. I was thinking & hoping she would stop when the show started. Well that never happened! This chick popped that damn gum all the way through the "Love Stories" act (EXCELLENT). When the lights came up for intermission, I had to stop my self from cussing her out! I hate a loud gum chewer, & not only that, why would you purchase box seats for a fine arts performance & act all ghetto by popping gum & you are over 25???

I was at the point that we had to move to prevent me from going over the edge. Eventually, I chilled a bit just before intermission ended & Suite Suzy agreed to switch seats with me. Now during the "The Road of the Phoebe Snow" act, Suite Suzy was about to kill her because the gum popping continued & she was talking to her girl who was seated next to her. Suite Suzy (also a gum popper at times) was annoyed also because the gum popper had on a pair of summer pumps with an open toe & white lace, then she had on a pink leather cocktail jacket obviously from Wilson Suede & Leather (very tacky). Lastly & to make matters worse she kept on pulling out this fucking Blackberry because it went off non-stop. At one point, I was wondering if she was sending text messages to Kwame Kilpaptrick so they could meet at the room after the show.

By the time the "Revelations" act started, we both had, had enough of the gum popping, Blackberry light & that tacky ass pink leather cocktail jacket. 2 damn hours of hot ghetto mess sitting next to you is not cool at all!

After the show, we headed out for Sushi & had a great meal, but the conversation on the way home was even better. Things started off by me telling Suite Suzy that I wanted to have a dancers body by June this year. She then laughed hard as hell & was like, Nigga that ain’t happening unless you get on that elliptical machine tonight & not get off that bitch until June, then we both laughed very hard.

Then we had a very interesting conversation on being Black, her own racial ambiguity, Barack Obama's dark lips, Irish penises & defining what is meant when people both Black & white say the "Black Experience". I really wish I was recording it because we both talked a lot of shit!

Wait' let me get back to the performance then I’m out. I can never get tired of seeing the dance troupe perform & will seem them anytime they come Detroit.

This is a shot from "Wade in the Water", my favorite part of the "Revelations" dance act. I found a good video of this act on YouTube, so if you are a fan of dance then you will enjoy this.

On My Way (Updated)

As most of you know, I have been hitting the gym at least 3 times a week if not more for the last 3 months in an effort to get rid of my my man tits. My last report on my status was about 3 weeks ago & I was at 12lbs down. Well, I am excited to let you know that I am now up to 16lbs lost & counting!

I weighed myself this past Thursday & just about shit a brick at the total! It feels so good to be back under 250lbs, for real. I guess fortunately for me, my weight is proportionate for the most part & I am not running around looking like a nasty fat nasty thinking I’m hot.

My diet restrictions are working big time & it has been a week since I stopped eating beef. I get weak every time I see a Burger King & have to basically stop breathing to avoid the temptation of the seductive aromas from the ubiquitous fast food restaurants in my area.

One thing that I feel that is making a difference is that I love working on the elliptical machine, & I think I am addicted to that thing! On average, I am riding it for 45 minutes to an hour & burn up to 600 calories while going a distance of about 5 miles. I basically am a sweaty mess after I get off but that is OK!

At this point, I know I will be hitting my target of 20lbs by Feb 08, so I need to start re-assessing my goal(s) for the next few months. Basically my goal at this point in general is to get back to my pre-jump off weight, which is my weight before I met Suite Suzy.

Back then I was 230lbs with no man tits, nice firm & round grabbable ass & plenty of energy. Speaking of ass, Suite Suzy grabbed it the other day & was like damn boo. I got a little geeked by that…

I think that I will be at the pre-jump off weight before the beginning of summer, which will mean that I can be back in my sexy man shirts with confidence.

Switching topics but not really, last Friday, I stopped at the Centaur for drinks & ran into one of the bouncers there whom I have not seen in a while. He was like hey man, looks like you are dropping pounds. I was like hell yeah! He was like shit, I lost 40lbs in 07 & want to lose another 50 or so. Then I told him about my status & pending goals. Then we talked about the increased energy especially in the bedroom. We both were like, damn who knew that them extra lbs would affect you in the sheets & laughed.

So to all my big brothas out there, drop that bottom so that you can freak like you used to back in the day! Women nowadays want a man who can go all night!!! At least that is what I am hearing from Kwame Kilpatrick’s boo, Christine Beatty.

20 lbs & 12 Years is how long ago this image was taken.

In full disclosure, I did not take this photo but the person who did, will remain nameless since I have a PPO out against her.
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Update:

I forgot to mention that music is also a major factor in the Bygbaby workout. Without it I think like most, things would be mundane!

I prefer pumping house tracks & rap (Mike Jones baby) to get me moving, but every now & then I have to throw in a little something down tempo to get my cool down going.

Here are 6 of my favorite workout jams (like you care):

Jill Scott - Not Like Crazy (Woo Woo Mix)
Nicole Willis & The Soul Investigators - Feeling Free
Glenn Underground - Contraversy
El Coco - Cocomotion '79
Fertile Ground - Let the Wind Blow (Ian Pooley Main Mix)
Pirahna Head - Poem 4 A Lost One (Black Music Remix)

I Hate You Even in Death

My HP 520n workstation finally bit the dust yesterday after 3 failed attempts to resuscitate.

This is officially the last PC that I will ever own flat out!!! I have had to totally restore it, seems like twice a year for the last 3 damn years.

The people @ HP support were always nice & helpful when chatting online, but I can no longer take it.

So after death was confirmed, I hopped on Apple.com & ordered a Refurb'd Mac Pro Quad (who could afford a new one???). I should be up & running next week & cannot wait!!! My next thing to get will be that 30” monitor, but that will be a while. Suite Suzy, if you are reading, just kidding about the monitor & thx so much for approving the purchase oh budget master!!!

Luckily I backed up recently on my external hard drive (a must have) so I lost very little. I called my best friend Brion (BFB) to get advice on getting info off the hard drive & he broke off the knowledge & is hooking up with me Saturday to extract what I need. During the conversation he told me how bored he has been lately & I asked why since I new he would be wrapped up into his graduate classes by now. He then said, Oh, I forgot to tell you, I graduated & was like as a matter of fact, I got my degree in the mail today (masters in computer science).

Last time we talked a little over a week ago, he asked me about helping to build a site for him so that he could refer potential employers to it. Nothing was said about this great news. Anyway, I am super excited for him. It seems like he blew through his program in no time. I joked with him & told him that he & his fiancé were going to be the next Barack & Michelle Obama, especially when she wraps up he PhD. We both laughed.

So anyway, I am much more broke n I was 24 hours ago, but at least I will have an “iSlave” soon!

Clever Sales Tactic???

So today, like most Mac geeks, I was on the Apple website today surfing for information & images on all of the updates & offerings that were announced today during the Macworld Conference & Expo keynote address. I was really getting geeked about the iPhone updates & could not wait to get home to upgrade my little baby.

So while surfing the Apple site, I ran across the ad (unedited) above. At first, I was like hmmm, that’s catchy. Then I took a second look & was like wait a minute; you hardly find people of color on Apple ads but on this one advertising a “free human”, you have a Black woman standing predominately in front of a white man.

While I get the base of the message, the image totally fucks things up. Maybe I am race baiting but why not advertise a free white woman or man predominately & leave people of color out of this one. In my mind this is just fucked up.

I told Suite Suzy about it & she told me I was set tripping, so I tried to think differently but I kept coming back to the same message. So officially consider me to be a set tripper.

Is it me or does this advertisement for an “iSlave”, just seemed fucked up?

Yet another disappointing ad move from Apple!

Quick Notes on Race

Months ago, I decided not to discuss race and all the drama surrounding it because I frankly became racially burned out. So to keep my therapy (via blogging) going I turned to photo-blogging & I have been enjoying it.

Although there have been many things in the news & some things that needed to be in the news I stayed quiet but was like damn, I would like to discuss that on the “Mindspill.” I guess to quench my thirst for Black news discussion; I turn to NPR’s "News & Notes" program, especially the Blogger’s Roundtable. Sometimes I find myself joining their discussions as if I was there, which may mean I am crazy, but it helps pass the time away when I am washing dishes etc.

I thought it was funny last week, when I was listening to the N&N Blogger's Rountable and heard Ferai Chideya asked the bloggers if too many Black bloggers are addicted to race, which was a play on Blogger Shelly's ("Boring Black Chick") post "UK & US: Differences in Black Blogging and Culture."

"Whether it's serious or humourous, intellectual or frivolous, it is very apparent that African American bloggers have race at the top of their agenda. Everything is distilled through an exclusively race-biased lens or is brought back to black/white racial politics."

I agree somewhat with Shelly & appreciate that she opened up a dialogue that will allow many of us to look at ourselves.

Anyway, I want to lightly touch on some Black news topics because I really have to get this off my chest.

1. Michael Vick – Who cares that he got sentenced to 2 years?!? His ass is lucky that he did not get the 5 he was facing & this is not even including state charges that he is yet to face. One thing that killed me was how so many Negroes were rallying behind him & we know he fucked up. I am not a dog lover & in fact I hate dogs (sorry dog lovers) but I would never wish to see harm on them or any animal and anyone knowingly harming any living being or thing needs to go down.
   
   Why do we as Black people rally behind someone we know is damn well guilty & needs to get brought up on charges (except for the 1st OJ trial, I know he didn’t do it!).
   

2. Mandatory Drug Sentencing – Well you all know that I recently did a little research paper on mandatory drug sentencing for my Eng Comp class which means that I am seeing the light at the end of the tunnel with only 3 more classes to go. While writing the paper I was reading up on the next faze of the debate of the recent decision to relax the sentencing guidelines for those busted for crack possession. The sad thing is that the sentencing mandatory minimums were relaxed but not equalized to the mandatory minimums of those busted for powdered cocaine & the 100:1 ratio is still in effect.
   
   Now that we are at least making some progress on sentencing disparities, Congress is looking at making the new sentencing guidelines retroactive & it is up for a vote tomorrow. Whether it goes retroactive or not, it has major implications for the Black community. If it goes retroactive, it will mean that 19k drug dealers/users will be released from prison over the next 2 years (give or take a few months). If it does not go retroactive, it will mean that the gub-a ment thinks that Black people aren’t shit & that we are expendable.
   
   With all that said, I have decided to position myself with those (like Hilary Clinton) who believe that this should not go retroactive. I am basing my decision on the fact that with all of the discussion in Congress & the Sentencing Commission, no one has mentioned anything about training programs for these 19k prisoners facing an early release. I am talking about programs, such as job training, parenting, education, rehabilitation etc. The types of programs that would help transition them back into society smoothly. When you think about it, the people got caught up into drugs because they had/have no options (so they say), they are uneducated & or economically challenged or marginalized in some other way.
   
   If these convicts are released now with no assistance I see the drug problem getting worse or morphing in untold ways. After all, if you have no skills & drugs are all you know, what the hell are you going to do???
   

3. I Love New York – I have been watching this show ever since season 2 started & I feel guilty as hell about it. VH1 is pimping out buffoonery, minstrelism & overall a poor representation of Black people & women in particular & I am all up in it helping to keep these fucked up shows on the air.
   
   With all this said, I am watching the finale tonight & am rooting for "Punk" even though he has that fucked up s-curl & horrible colored contacts. Of all the guys left, I think he would work out the best. On another note, if you are watching this guilty
   pleasure also, did you see it last week when the families were on? I through up in
   my mouth when I saw Punk's sister. She is ugly as hell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
   
   Correction: I had it twisted because I though the finale was last night but it was not! Further more Punk got kicked off so now it is down to Bitch ass Tailor Made & Ass Kicking Buddha. Hmmmm, not sure what I would like to see happen now. I really think Punk did not get chose because he did not offer that much drama. New York really looked hurt to see him go, so I am wondering if the producers had anything to do with the final decision??????? Guess I will see what jumps off next Monday.
   

Race rant over for now. Back to my personal drama & photography!

Oh wait, I need to mention that I was on the Alexyss K Tylor’s “Vagina Power” show last week. The show was on Why Men Like Sneaky Pussy. You can listen to it here & I am on like the last 40 minutes or so. Warning, if you listen & are a prude, do not be shocked when you here me say pussy, hot dick & nuts or getting fucked in the face OK! Here is the link

Why Come You Didn't Call Me

Cluizel, if you are reading this, I know yo ass did not come to town today & did not even give a brotha a call. You know I would have picked you up from the airport in a gypsy cab & Suite Suzy & I would have prepared you a ghetto meal with all of the Negro fixin's.

Suite Suzy is like no she didn’t. After we shared all of those appetizers at the Negril Grill!!!

Why you trippin’? Call me boo, OK.

Almost Lost

Last night, I planted myself on the couch, popped open my laptop & inserted my memory card to go through the photos from the party that I covered Saturday (11/03/07) night. I also planned on processing photos that I took while out & about Sunday (11/04/07).

Things were going smooth until I opened up Photoshop & noticed that all of my photos were missing.

At this point I started to shit a brick because I had a lot of damn images; like 200 & some change + if I could not produce photos from the party, I would not be getting paid.

After my panic was over, I collected myself & went into my home office to try the memory card on my desktop.

So now I am at my desk & looking at an empty card with unreadable files. WTF could have happened??????

Again, after my panic was over, I collected myself & went online to see if I could do something to get my photos back. While Googling, I found several memory card recovery options, but guess what, none were free (shit!).

So I download one on a trial basis & it did not work, which made me lose my mind. I go back to Google for another option & found something & gave it a try.

Five minutes later, it was looking like I my images were actually recoverable after 5 showed up. Well after the 5 images showed up, I got a message saying, if you want more, register this software now.

Three minutes & $19.95 later, I had the full version of Zero Assumption Recovery software. Ten minutes after that, all of my images were back & my blood pressure went back down.

From this, I learned that I need to format my memory card every time after I take off my most recent photos. From my reading this will help prevent problems like this. Now that I have this software, I guess I feel more secure should this happen one mo gin.

Here is one of my newly recovered images; a still life that I hooked up yesterday afternoon in the kitchen.

Bygbaby: Life in Mood Pink

Yesterday in class I had a midterm exam & got 3 fucking questions wrong out of 15 & I missed some pretty easy shit too but oh well, the damage is done.

I hate tests probably like most people, I mean no matter what the test is. At first I seem to forget all that I know, then struggle to pluck all knowledge from my disjointed memory bank.

Luckily, the test doesn’t really count for shit, so I guess I can chill on tripping.

So after I bombed the test, I started thinking about getting home to my camera & new lighting equipment to play around. I came up with this idea to capture myself at my laptop with some fun lights, seems simple enough right!

Now I am home setting up running back & forth hoping my setup is perfect & after about 20 minutes of tweaking, I am set to go.

This is the end result of my post exam fuck up. I took about 15 shots & this is my favorite of them all.

I guess by coincidence I look melancholy but I love the way my lips look… I know I am a narcissist!

Jaunita Bynum's New Man

I talked to my mom today & she was all up in arms about Jaunita Bynum getting her ass beat by her man recently. Of course I was with her on how fucked up the whole thing was/is but then she got all religious during the conversation & almost started "speaking in tounges" and shit.

At this point, I was ready to hang up because I was not about to listen to all that shit. So to throw my mom off I told her Jaunita's man beat her ass because he caught her in lesbian affair & could not take it. Mom was like oh hell nall, WTF. Yeah she went from speaking in tounges to cussing all while smoking on the same cigarette. Mom later went on to tell me that Jaunita's man admitted on some show somewhere that he was sexually molested by his uncle as a child & since then has been struggling with wanting hot dick & nuts while under the spell of Jaunita's evangelistic holier than thou pussy power.

Well, I guess after Jaunita's man goes to prison; the struggle over wanting hot dick & nuts will end as he will be in the land of plenty.

So tonight I was doing some ghetto research on Jaunita & found out that she already has a new man. You will not believe who she is fucking with now... Well according to TGNN (The Ghetto News Network), Jaunita is fucking with "The Spirit of Truth".

I am not sure if you are up on "The Spirit of Truth" but this Nigga is out of his mutha fuckin' mind. Check this:

I think "The Spirit of Truth" should hook up with my girl Alexyss Tylor & do a show. That shit would be so off the hook!!!

Anyway, I'm outta of the piece headed to Toronto for the long holiday weekend with the family so have a safe weekend yourself.

OK, wait, I am almost done talking shit but before I go I just wanna issue a fashion reminder. Remember not to wear white after Monday because if you do, I’m personally going to fuck you up. Fashion has not changed & white is not a year round color option (Icy White Air Force Ones are the one exception to this rule). Lastly, I wanna know who went out & got an outfit for Labor day to be sharp at the BBQ.

Holla,
Bygbaby

I Love Danger Kitty: A Little Family Drama Rant

Today I have to run to Cleveland for the funeral for one of my brother’s (Topot) cousins (we have different dads). His cousin ws murdered by her babies daddy a little over a week ago & there has been much drama surrounding this as you can imagine.

You see my brother has some mental challenges & sometimes I just have to do what I have to for him. Shit, I really do not want to make this trip but I have to + my mother ran a guilt trip on me.

What is making this trip something that I have to do is because Topot’s dad was released from prison after years for murdering a man who was looking at his “lady”. He shanked this mutha with a knife in the name of ghetto love. Now he is reformed I guess.

Anyway, my brother has not seen his dad since 1978 (meaning since he was 2). Over the years, that have talked a few times & my brother has longed for a relationship.

Since his release, my mother is acting like she wants to see him more than anyone. It kinda nasty, but I can hear in her voice that she may want to break off that for old times piece.

What makes this extra fucked is that he (oh yeah, his name is Sir Skip) tried to kill my mom like twice & used to beat the living hell out of her during their marriage. I never witnessed any of this but heard the horrific stories. And now she wants to skin grin up in his face.

I swear sometimes I do not understand woman who suffer(ed) from Stockholm Syndrome especially my own mother. (end of family drama rant)

Totally switching topics now, last week I was at the Detroit Urban Craft Fair taking some shots for fun & spotted several interesting things & people. On of the most interesting things I saw were this little strange knit cats.

They were kinda scary & fun but not fun enough for me to buy one!

So you know I am gonna ask you to caption this. Let's say in 5 words or less.

Ohh, ohh, me first: Give me Fancy Feast bitches!
Wait, I have one more: I am one dangerous pussy!

Searching For the Perfect Lunch

My last few work days have been pretty intense with cross town mid/late day meeting, which always fuck up my lunch options. When it comes to lunch, I usually take leftovers but for the last few work days we either had no leftovers or if we did, my meetings were so jammed pack, I would not have time for it because I had to eat on the go.

Needless to say, I have made some pretty bad lunch choices so that I could eat on the go & make my meetings.

Yesterday I had back to back meeting starting @ 1230 which means that I only had 2½ hours to get some real work done because I don’t get to the office until 9 & I needed an hour for drive & lunch time.

So it’s now 1130 & I am headed out of the office & the only on my fat ass mind was what the fuck was I going to eat. I had McDonald’s the other day & I was not in the mood for another #1, the thought of Burger King made me want to throw up in my mouth. I thought about Taco Hell but I was not in the position to be farting all day gassing people out @ work.

After all of my intense junk food elimination process I decided to get Sushi from one of my new hot spots; Sadako.

I have been eating @ Sadako for the last few months & they have some really good stuff but their service is on the slow side, so if you are in a rush Sadako is not a good choice. Well I was somewhat in a rush but willing to risk it to get some good food.

After all was said & done I was in and out in 35 minutes; a fucking record. When I eat at Sushi I prefer to eat at the bar because I like watching the Sushi chefs work; it kinda adds to the experience. Luckily I was able to get a spot at the bar today, which helped me get some cool shots of Sushi chef Yoshi @ work.

These are a few shots of my delicious & not as junky lunch of seasweed salad, a Philadelphia roll & some golden fried scrumptiously greasy beef dumplings.

After lunch, I made a mad dash to my 1st meeting & made it one time & best of all, I was not farting like crazy through the afternoon like I had been over the previous days.

Term of The Week: Draptomania

I got the idea for this week’s term while watching "CSA" (Confederate States of America). CSA is a mockumentary that examines American history post Emancipation Proclamation if the confederate army won.

If you have not seen or heard about it, I suggest you check it out. It's pretty funny & actually makes you think about some things. I hate to spoil but one of my favorite parts in the movie is when the historian tells the story of Harriet Tubman rescuing Abraham Lincoln & puts him in Black Face. He then questions her about it & she, look we both Niggas now, so come on and let's roll!

Draptomania - A Mental Disease, which gives slaves the urge to want to run away from their sweet & loving slave master.

Etymology - (drapetes - a runaway (in this case a negro slave)) (mania – madness or frenzy)

Draptomania was manufactured by Samuel A. Cartwright, a Louisiana physician. The diagnosis appeared in a paper published in the New Orleans Medical and Surgical Journal, where Dr. Cartwright argued that the tendency of slaves to run away from their captors was in fact a treatable medical disorder. His feeling was that with "proper medical advice, strictly followed, this troublesome practice that many Negroes have of running away can be almost entirely prevented. "Cartwright suggested that the only way to cure a slave from this infliction was to beat the shit out of him.

Cartwright also said that if treated kindly, well fed and clothed, with fuel enough to keep a small fire burning all night - separated into families, each family having its own house - not permitted to run about at night to visit their neighbors, to receive visits or use intoxicating liquors, and not overworked or exposed too much to the weather, they are very easily governed - more so than any other people in the world.
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Draptomania Today: My POV:

Sometimes I apply this term to our Black men, who seem to be affected by this disease. Why do I say this? Well, I think about all of those babies with no daddies. I think about all of the Black women out they with a man who will not marry them because "they are not ready". Bottom line is I see a lot of Black men running away from responsibility & this eats me up as a Black man holding it down in my home & community.

I will end here because I am on the verge of a rant.

Related Post ~Slave Economics (SECO 101)

On a Light Note: Nappy Headed Hoes

My boy Ray-Ray works in HR, so hit me up if you plan to attend!

On the way home, the only thing on my mind was "nappy headed hoes" & how fucked up that sounds but don't be mad at me because the more I thought about it I started to laugh inside & just how ridiculous this phrase is. I am in no way downplaying the media firestorm over the stringy headed media hoe Imus situation but merely focusing on how sometimes language takes me there.

In the words of Nikki Giovanni:

"English isn't a good language to express emotion through
mostly I imagine because people try to speak English
instead of trying to speak through it..."
~ My House (1972)

Bygbaby & The Nation

The video may take a second to download but it's worth the wait. I decided to record this video because I just could not write the words out to explain my experience with the passion that I wanted express. If you are new to the Mind Spill Blog, I suggest you read my Ghetto Disclaimer before proceeding.

To view you will need Apple's Quicktime Player installed.

Mommie Dearest

This list is inspired by actual events & a recent argument had with my wonderfully selfish mother “mother”. I try not to air my dirty laundry on the mind spill but I am upset right now & need to get this out or implode.

I love my mother to death but sometimes, she trips me out to the point where I can not believe. With all of this I offer the following.

How do you know when your parent is not the best:

• When you have to give them gas money to visit you
  
• When they do not offer to watch your kids
  
• When they make your wife who has just given birth by cesarean section clean up a mess that the newborn made that requires my wife to scrub a stain out of the carpet as the parent-in-law bitches about her life while sipping on Arbor Mist
  
• When they do not come to their grandchild’s baptism & offers no explanation
  
• When they tell you that they don’t have time to baby-sit because they raised their kids & not about to raise yours
  
• When you have to pay them to baby-sit
  
• When you cannot barrow their mixer; in this case a Kitchen-Aid) for 1 week until I can purchase an additional one for myself. I need two for an additional mixer because… well wait, I will post on the reason why I need to soon.
  
• When they fucked up your credit before you left the house at 18 years of age
  
• When the make you eat weenie beanie as her & her man eat steak & shrimp
  
• I need to stop here

I reserve the right to add to this list if I can think of anything else my mother has done to piss me off over the last 32 years. This list happens to be from some recent shit that just does not sit well with me. This post may be removed, once I calm down or…

I am sick of...

• Hearing about Oprah's fucking "Legends Ball" actually I am sick of anything dealing with Oprah
• Angry illegal immigrants
  
• The war on terror | Anything dealing with the Middle East & their "wars", car bombings etc
  
• Our stupid president
  
• Personal social issues needing constitutional amendments i.e. abortion rights, SSM not S&M but SSM (Same Sex Marriages)
  
• Ghetto 911 workers in Detroit

Mother's Day & Last Minute Shopping

Yesterday while on my annual last minute Mother’s Day shopping trip, I had just about the worst experience I think I have ever had. First I had to go to the Coach store to send back my “Man Purse” because the buckle on the front pocket was becoming loose & when I go to the store, it was a total frenzy on other last minute shoppers. So after waiting in line for a bit, I finally got to the register to get my bag assessed. The cashier was very friendly & accommodating even offering my 40% off any new bag if I found one that fit my needs. Unfortunately everything they had was not sufficient & was obviously for a woman.

As my transaction was wrapping up, I heard the most obnoxious ghetto ring tone ever & the volume was so loud I heard it from 10 feet away loud & clear. Because I was so shocked at the volume & the ring tone (some rap song) I looked at the woman whose phone it was in utter disgust (reflex). I was not the only to glare at her in line & as I looked away, she made the comment “damn ain’t no body every heard a phone ring before?” Well 1) I have as I am not deaf, 2) why is you phone so fucking loud are you deaf, & 3) why have some stupid as rap song as a ring tone it’s annoying to everyone else. I choose to ignore her, completed my transaction & moved on to shop for my mamma & Suite Suzy.

Now that my “man purse” drama is over I need get Suite Suzy the watch she has been hinting at which I found at Marshall Field’s Dept Store (Hudson’s to anyone in MI). I arrive at the watch counter to check out what is available & the clerk asked me if she could help me & I said “yes please.” She continued to stand there vs. approaching me to actually take care of me so I just stood there I looked at here like she was a damn fool. She eventually approached me & asked again if she could help me. This time she actually did her fucking job & started to pull out watches for me to assess. I eventually picked the one that I thought that Suite Suzy wanted I purchased then moved on to get my mamma’s gift,

My mom is a perfume fiend so perfume was the obvious choice. As I made me my through Marshall Field’s I was overwhelmed be all of the perfumes etc. Every turn I made I was sprayed at like I was a roach being fumigated. After a while I was starting to get pissed off, & was starting to rethink my gift options. I was accosted by every perfume counter worker that I passed, I was starting to get paranoid, I mean these women in white coats when coming after me from out of nowhere. Eventually I ended up at the Elizabeth Arden counter & the woman there was not pushy so I settled there to check out her offerings & she directed me to the new Catherine Zeta-Jones perfume line ("Provocative Woman."), the she asked me if I wanted to smell it & I bluntly told her hell no (If I smelled anything else I was going to blow major chunks). To get the hell out of there ASAP I asked her to wrap up what she thought would be the best option, then she rang me up & I ran for the door like never before.

After being in aroma purgatory, I headed for Lord & Taylor to buy myself a gift & I as made the corner to the store, I saw all of these clearance signs & was like wait, it is really the start of the summer merchandising period, whet the hell could be on clearance already. Well after I got closer to the store I saw that the signs were actually close out signs because the store was closing. At this point I rushed through the store & saw that they mainly had winter merchandise 30-60% & hardly anything for spring/summer.

Because I like to shop off season for good deals this was still a win-win situation but eventually I started to realize that all of the big boy sizes were gone (if I were a 34-36 I would have been in heaven). The good news & bottom line of this store visit was that I found the Michael Kors wool ¾ length coat I saw back before x-mas originally 300 bucks now 99. I quickly snatched that up & found a cashmere sweater for only 30 bucks, a plaid summer blazer for 40 bucks & finally some Godiva Specialty Truffles for my mom & Suite Suzy for Mother’s Day. Finally cost for all 199.36!!!

Now that I had gifts all I needed to get was cards, so after I picked up my kids we scooped by Hallmark so they could get the card they wanted & that took like 45 minutes as they debated back & forth. Finally everything was purchased & I just needed to sneak it all in the house, which I did successfully. It’s 830 pm.

About 915pm the power in my neighborhood goes out (very frequent occurrence) & thank God that dinner was prepared before hand. While the delicious meal was still hot, we ate as a family by candle light. Before dinner Suite Suzy called DTE (energy provider) to report the lights being out & to find out if there was an estimate on when the lights would be on. The automated response informed her that the lights would be on in an estimated 3 hours & based on this, we chilled for the night.

It’s now 130am the lights are still not on & I have been reading by candle light at the dinner table.

It’s now 630am & my cell phone alarm is going off as I awaken to discover that the power is still off & fall back to sleep.

It’s now 730am & DTE finally decided to cut the fucking power on & all of my bedroom & bathroom lights illuminate & we all breath a sigh of relief wish Suite Suzy a happy Mother’s day then fall right back to sleep.

BTW, once my mom opened the perfume I finally was open to smelling & it smelled very beautiful. She loved it & both my mom & Suite Suzy laughed at the name as my mom has been known to be a "Provocative Woman."
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Origins of Mother’s Day:
Contrary to popular belief, Mother's Day was not conceived and fine-tuned in the boardroom of Hallmark. The earliest tributes to mothers date back to the annual spring festival the Greeks dedicated to Rhea, the mother of many deities, and to the offerings ancient Romans made to their Great Mother of Gods, Cybele. Christians celebrated this festival on the fourth Sunday in Lent in honor of Mary, mother of Christ. In England this holiday was expanded to include all mothers and was called Mothering Sunday.

In the United States, Mother's Day started nearly 150 years ago, when Anna Jarvis, an Appalachian homemaker, organized a day to raise awareness of poor health conditions in her community, a cause she believed would be best advocated by mothers. She called it "Mother's Work Day."

Fifteen years later, Julia Ward Howe, a Boston poet, pacifist, suffragist, and author of the lyrics to the "Battle Hymn of the Republic," organized a day encouraging mothers to rally for peace, since she believed they bore the loss of human life more harshly than anyone else.

In 1905 when Anna Jarvis died, her daughter, also named Anna, began a campaign to memorialize the life work of her mother. Legend has it that young Anna remembered a Sunday school lesson that her mother gave in which she said, "I hope and pray that someone, sometime, will found a memorial mother's day. There are many days for men, but none for mothers."

Anna began to lobby prominent businessmen like John Wannamaker, and politicians including Presidents Taft and Roosevelt to support her campaign to create a special day to honor mothers. At one of the first services organized to celebrate Anna's mother in 1908, at her church in West Virginia, Anna handed out her mother's favorite flower, the white carnation. Five years later, the House of Representatives adopted a resolution calling for officials of the federal government to wear white carnations on Mother's Day. In 1914 Anna's hard work paid off when Woodrow Wilson signed a bill recognizing Mother's Day as a national holiday.

At first, people observed Mother's Day by attending church, writing letters to their mothers, and eventually, by sending cards, presents, and flowers. With the increasing gift-giving activity associated with Mother's Day, Anna Jarvis became enraged. She believed that the day's sentiment was being sacrificed at the expense of greed and profit. In 1923 she filed a lawsuit to stop a Mother's Day festival, and was even arrested for disturbing the peace at a convention selling carnations for a war mother's group. Before her death in 1948, Jarvis is said to have confessed that she regretted ever starting the mother's day tradition.

Despite Jarvis's misgivings, Mother's Day has flourished in the United States. In fact, the second Sunday of May has become the most popular day of the year to dine out, and telephone lines record their highest traffic, as sons and daughters everywhere take advantage of this day to honor and to express appreciation of their mothers. Source

Mother’s Day Corsage Meanings:
Red indicates your mother is alive
White indicates your mother passed away
Yellow indicates a bereaved mother

Coming to an End

Today is the big day & I take my math final my math final! I have been studying all day & will continue to prepare until the drop dead time. Will the Math Dummy prevail & move on to the next level???

Suite Suzy basically told me that If I did not take the final that she was going to never let me live it down & that happens to be one of her specialties.

My instructor & I had the following correspondence status post chapter ten test.

Hi Brian,

You earned a 61.5% on the Chapter 10 test. I hope you decide to complete the Final Exam. It will give you a sense of how much you learned this semester. You may surprise yourself.

X
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Hello X,

My wife & some friends actually gave me a serious pep talk today, so I will be doing the final & working hard to make it happen. Since I have been back in school, I am only maintained A's & B's so this is a hard challenge for me to deal with. I have put so much hard work & hours into to through in the towel now.

So I guess don't count me out now. :-) Can you also remind me of all of my quiz scores 6-9 (again)

Brian
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Hi Brian,

I'm glad to hear that you have a support network that won't let you quit.

Your scores for each chapter are:

Chapter 6- 60%
Chapter 7-70%
Chapter 8-78%
Chapter 9-53%

Your average is 64.5%. This accounts for 70% of your grade.

You will receive full credit for homework.

It is totally reasonable for you to pass this class somewhere in the C-range.

Good luck!

X
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I just cannot wait for Tuesday to be here, the fucking end of this majorly intense semester. I usually go to Chili’s after my last class to celebrate, but I think this semester I will chill on the traditions because I just ain’t (yes I said ain’t) in a celebratory mood.

Stay tuned!!!!!!!!!!

The Rebound

Ok, so after my school drama was all said & done with yesterday, as posted I did my stint @WDET & had lots of fun with my fellow volunteers packing pledge premiums from 6-830 & did hang out with Cousin Dee. Cousin Dee & I went to “Trendy” Ferndale, MI for a delicious Thai dinner, then afterward to The Bosco for drinks & “No Wax Wednesday.

No Wax Wednesday, is where the party goers are the DJ all night long & all you need is an Mp3 player ready to go with your jams. You get to play 3 of your songs & I was really ready to go because I had 19 of my current favorite tracks ready to go. By the time the night was over, Cousin Dee I had several B52’s & Mojito’s, making for a very good Wednesday night buzz. I think & I am sure that Cousin Dee would agree that the best part of the evening was when we actually go to “Battle” on the dance floor (actually on the pseudo turn table call out Mp3 players.

If you are in Detroit or the surrounding area, you have to check out The Bosco! The crowd was good & diverse, the atmosphere is very Euro Chic, & the drinks passed the test. I hope to go back soon so that I can battle with Cousin Dee or another willing to take me on: I have over 35K songs & always ready to Mp3 battle.

My Battle Playlist for 04/26/06:

• Tom Tom Club – Wordy Rappingham
• LaChat – You Ain’t Mad iz Ya
• Voom Voom – Roger
• Xaver Fisher Trio – Follow Me
• Soul Music - Soul Music

All in all, the battle was a draw: We both played some jams! Peace for now as it is time for my nightly nap,

Bygbaby

Decision Made: Confessions of a Math Dummy

I think I am going to skip my last test in my math class today. Why? Last week, I approached my instructor & asked her what I needed to do to pass & after she told me my heart sank.

Basically, I have to get a 90% on the last test & bust an 80% on the final. So when she said that, I was like I can do it so I studied hard like always (with it never really paying off) & now I am like fuck it. I know I am not going to get a 90%, sit I could barley get a 70% on the other tests & the final is a fucking pipe dream.

I feel like an idiot because, I never give up & always find a way to make it through. This class will be a serious blow to my GPA, not to mention the fact that I have to pay my employer back for the tuition advance that I received. I guess since I am making this decision, this will give me time to prepare for my Poli Sci final next Monday, which I am going to pass. I do now know what to do from hear about making up the math class.

I am really trippin’ on this so help me out (show me that I am not alone & a total loser); have you had to drop because you knew the situation was bleak or have to make up a fail class? If yes to either, don't be shamed. Am I contributing tot the plight of the Black man???

***Note to self: Suite Suzy is going to be pissed & turned off when I tell her of my decision! End Note***

To celebrate my decision, I will be hanging @ The Bosco after some Thai food with Cousin Dee tomorrow night following my volunteer shift at my favorite radio station in the whole wide world; WDET FM. I hope I get a chance to see Ed Love because he is the man & his show is the bomb. If you are a jazz fan, then his program is for you. The show can be streamed online, s bring some of Detroit to your town, bedroom, living room, or where ever you are reading this.

I think I am getting over my decision as I continue to type. See how I went from trippin' to Jazz. My it's just me Euphoric Dependent Narcissistic Schizophrenic disorder.

Confessions of a Math Dummy,
Bygbaby

The Good News Is...

I saw my surgeon this past Friday & my ankle is getting better & I only have to wear my cast fro one more week. This coming Friday I have to see a specialist who makes orthodic devices, so that I can be fitted for a custom ankle brace. I was told that this brace would cost approx 500 bucks & my insurance will not cover, but my surgeon said he will fight like hell to get them to pay for it.

I guess if it all boils down to it & it helps, I will come out of my pocket vs. suffering from having a fucked up ankle at the age of 31. If you hear a story on the news about an angry Black man robbing a bank for 500 dollars, you know who it is. LOL.

I hate to think about what things will be like years from now. Anyway, I also have to attend physical therapy twice a week for a month. I am happy school is almost over, so that I can concentrate on getting better. Pass or fail!

Peace

The Crack Head

I mention Crack Heads often in some of my posts, so after a conversation with my little sister “Baby” about young back men & women & that state of relationships, I am compelled to quote one of Baby’s statements. "Crack Heads are like Nike Air Force Ones, they will never leave the hood.” When she said that I almost fell out of my chair laughing because I was not expecting such a great, hilarious, & very possible comparison.

The statement is stemming from a portion of the conversation that related to young Black men selling crack in “our” communities. My thing was, why is crack still so popular after 20 years, unrealistically thinking that it would someday go “out of style”. Baby pointed out that as long as the Crack Head exist, so will the wasted life drug dealer.

On an unrelated note, my Baby is 7 months pregnant, with my moms (Nana) 1st grandson. We are so excited about Baby’s baby who, will unfortunately will be named after his father (a Jr.). I was hoping that she would name him Maxwell, which was the name I had picked out for my last child until I found out that I would not be having a boy. I am hoping that I can eventually convince her, so we will see: I still have 2 months to work on it. If I am unsuccessful, I will just stick to the nickname that I already have picked out for him “Bay Bay”. Everybody has to have a cousin “Bay Bay”!