The Skid Marks, Lesbian with Beaver, & Traffic Pile Up

Today I was having a pretty good day at work, getting things accomplished, checking off my to do list etc, then I just so happened to look at the clock & realized that it was almost time to go. So I started to wrap things up as usual, then nature started calling me, indicating that I needed to take care of some “business”; it’s 3:50pm. I enter the restroom & proceed to the stall to take care of my “business” then I was stopped dead in my tracks when I looked at the toilet & saw that it was packed with shit, piss & tissue.

My first reaction was like what the fuck, I need to take a serious dump & I cannot not because of some trifling as grown mutha fucka left that nasty hot mess. I then got angry & approached the building manager to alert her of the situation because this shit (playing on words) keeps happening. Most times I go to the restroom there are major skids, piss left in the toilet & I will not even go there on the pubs in & around the toilet seat, which means that I have to hold it until I get home which can be intense if traffic is bad.

So while talking to the building manger, she told me that she would send a message out to all of the guys in the building (there are only like 12 or so). So now it is 4:00pm & I really need to release or suffer or the unthinkable; at this point I said fuck it, I will shit at home in my nice clean bathroom. I get in the car & head for the freeway as I make my way to a sanitary situation & soon as I get on the on ramp, traffic came to a sudden stop 4 cars ahead of me & I had to swerve a bit to avoid hitting the person in front of me.

After wondering what the hell was going on, I suddenly see a fucking beaver sprint across the damn on ramp. This bitch 4 cars ahead of me stopped & almost caused a 5 car (or more) pile up to save a fucking beaver. After she started to drive off everyone jetted past her blowing their horns in disgust. When I got up on her I laid on the horn & flipped her off the throw a bottle of water at her stupid ass (just kidding).

side note: I did tell Suite Suzy that if we actually had a traffic accident, I would have picked up that damned beaver & beat the ladies ass with it (not condoning violence towards women).

It is now 4:15, I am more upset than I was @ 4:00pm, almost got killed because some dumb fuck wanted save a fucking beaver, still gotta poop & the traffic is backing up.

Is now 4:45pm, I have taken care of my business & feel my relief & preparing to post a sign tomorrow in the restroom @ work which will state, “I am sick of your shit, urine stains & skid marks blah blah blah. Learn proper work restroom etiquette or wear a Depends you stupid as BIAAAAAAACTH!”

Question: Is it a faux pas to take care of business at work/take a dump/shit?

Talk to me!